a wish to not come true.

to be up on a cloud
where i can be loud

where i could cry if i wanted
or just fly.

to be up on a cloud in your arms again.

what i would give right now
to be up there,
to be next to you.
ask me, i would do.

i'm mad at you for leaving me there
but i can see why you had to go
its crazy here.

i just wish you took me too.
i have no one to talk with, like how i used to with you.

i thought i did, but he's gone too.

"oh no, here comes that sun again.
that means another day without you my friend.
and it hurts me to look into the mirror at myself.
and it hurts even more..." -BH

sunday afternoon

there's only one you...
strongest love i ever felt...
nothing more real...

...in the world.

awwww, stress.

rash on the hands,
jokes are swirling
doctor takes a gander
looks as though he pities me
i wonder the cause
dyshidrosis eczema
directly related to high stress


money? no
school? no
soccer? ...maybe
then what?!


"oh, it is love."

nice to know you, goodbye.

amazing?
i think so.

high school, bye school

summer, church,
hi its nice to meet you
this girls beautiful i dono what to do
hi its nice to meet you too

school, lunch,
you know its been on my mind
damn hes so fine
we should take it further
its about time

every day, for 6 months,
baby you know i love you
man i really do
baby you know i love you too

school, graduation
im leaving.
its over with me and you.
its been the only thing on my mind.
but baby-- i thought-- man its fine
maybe itll work out another time.

summer, phone rings,
hey its me sorry i havent called
how are you
now what am i supposed to do?
i miss you
yeah yeah i miss you too

every day, since,
i dont know,
i just cant get him out of my head
everything will be fine
yeah i know my mom says itll just take time

knock, at my door,
hey we gotta talk
i cant get over you
im still in love
do you love me?
i hope you do

no,
you broke my heart in two.
i cant-- i dont love you.

dusk

windows down
music loud
absolutely no one around.
windy roads
with no stops.
destination?
have plans
but nothing will rush me

time

lets talk about time.
time lasts forever.
"time heals all"
time stops when im with you.
time controls my all day.
time go.
time stop.
you plan time.
you forget the time.
time freezes sometimes.
the more i need time to pass
the slower it goes
and
the more i want this moment to stay
time takes it away.
lets talk about time.
you can remember a time
over and over.
the time plays
over and over,
and you hate it.
then
you wish you could remember a time
but you go blank
over and over,
and you hate that
you really do.
time is good
and
so evil too.

Tug of War
is
r i p p i n g
me apart.

Head vs Heart.

Abuelito

If you were here, you'd be proud of me.
If you were here, I would feel alright.
I can't wait to kiss your prickly face.
I can't wait to hold your hand.
If you were here, you'd take me out.
You would do anything for me, and I for you.
December fourth was the saddest day of my life.
I lost you.
I know you will always be with me, but
If you were here now, I would feel alright.
I really miss you, and I think about you all the time.
If you were here, you'd tell me how much I look like my mother.
You'd tell me that I'm beautiful- I know you would.
If you were here, you'd be the best dressed.
You'd be the most charming, but you know all this.
If you were here, I wouldn't need anyone else.
If you were here, we would light up the room.
We always did when we were together.
I remember how you smell.
You always smelled good.
I remember when you put oil in your hair it'd become yellow.
If you were here, you'd cherish me.
You would never let me cry.
I know you'd hug me forever if I asked you to.
You would bring me along just because huh?
I know you would.
If you were here, you'd be at every game.
You already know, you'd be my biggest fan.
The only one I would see in the stand.
I can feel your boxed chest, and your 5 o'clock after shave.
I remember your voice.
I wish I could hear it again.
If you were here Abuelito, I'd be here too.